A Willing Donkey
Have you ever come to a situation where you knew the answer to someones question, but you felt inadequate… you just didn’t think that you could find the right words? You may have felt guilty that you didn’t try to share or you comforted yourself with the thought that God would send them someone like your pastor or teacher. If this has happened to you, you aren’t alone.
One day I got brave. I answered a question, even put out an offer to study with them. The offer was taken up and I was ready.
Within the first two minutes of our meeting I was overwhelmed…in deep and over my head. I had been frantically praying, pleading for God to help me, but wit for wit I was plainly the looser.
Now I’m not proud of what happened next but I think it was important. The stress had been so great that when I got up from that meeting I promptly went to my room closed the door, and had a tantrum. I lay on the floor praying and kicking my feet letting off steam. I bawled, I even had out-loud words with God.
“You made a mistake, I can’t do this!” I said this phrase a dozen times if I said it once. “God, I claimed the promise for words, where was the answer, I looked like a fool.”
Slowly I began to relax, my prayer changed. “God, I’m sorry. If this is really what you want me to do I am willing.” I got up off the floor and headed to our cabinet shop to help my husband. As we worked in silence the words to a song by Don Francisco came to mind. It was the story of Balaam, the last few lines caught my attention.
“…But you know it’s that talking donkey that’s really strange in deed
Now that donkey’s just a donkey but she’s still the thing God used
And that’s the point I want you all to see
The Lord’s the one who makes the choice of the instrument He’s usin’
We don’t know the reasons and the plans behind His choosin’
So when the Lord starts usin’ you don’t you pay it any mind
He ‘could have used the dog next door if He’d been so inclined”
Although the lesson Mr. Francisco was trying to relay was slightly different it clicked! “We don’t know the reasons and the plans behind His choosin” Yes, I know God appointed me for this time to share and in the future many more. What He wanted from me was simply a willing heart, not one thinking it had all the answers.
Soon we completed our task in the shop and I headed to the house. I went to my desk and got a sticky note and wrote “A willing donkey” on it in bold letters and stuck it above my computer screen.
It may not have seemed like it at the time, but God never left my side. Although I knew I had made a blundering mess, God did answer my prayer. Somehow she saw past my blunderings and returned. One meeting turned into another and another and it still continues. Our friendship grows as we exchange thoughts and friendship. Sometimes He gives me words to say or directs me to something I can share where the point has been made clearly by another. Even more often all He needs me for is to be a listening ear… you know donkeys have over sized ears!
“Who makes people so they can speak or not speak, hear or not hear, go and do as I have told you I will help you speak well, and I will tell you what to say.” Exodus 4:11 & 12 NLT
“And I have put my words in your mouth and hidden you safely in my hand. I stretched out the sky like a canopy and laid the foundations of the earth…” Isaiah 51:16 NLT
“Each time he said, “My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness.” So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me. That’s why I take pleasure in my weaknesses… For when I am weak, then I am strong.” 2 Corinthians 12: 9 & 10
“So, my dear brothers and sisters, be strong and immovable. Always work enthusiastically for the Lord, for you know that nothing you do for the Lord is ever useless.” 1 Corinthians 15:58 NLT
“…This is what the LORD says: Do not be afraid! Don’t be discouraged… for the battle is not yours, but God’s.” 2 Chronicles 20:15